In my last article which seems like a long time ago, I talked about identity and presented a view (taken from others smarter than me) that our identity is a set of stories we tell ourselves about ourselves that our brains believe and take as true.
The other side of the identity coin is reputation which reflects what others believe about us based on what we say and do.
In a team, especially in a high performance oriented team, a key tenet is that team members put the objectives and goals of the team above their own for most of the time! (check out my LinkedIn Group on High Performance)
Potentially this sets up a direct conflict with our identities. If our identities are powerful and central to us, putting the team first is going to be tough, especially where that requires us to do things or behave differently than our identity says we should.
Building awareness of who you believe you are versus how you show up is super important. By building awareness of both parts of us, we’ll be able to close the gap between what we believe and how we show up.
If you’re a leader, this is important so that you are able to adjust your approach to be heard, trusted and get the results you want.
If you’re a member of the team, this is important so that you are able to understand what’s affecting your ability to be a committed and accountable member of the team.
Additional awareness can be generated by assessments if you have access to them.
Another person you trust who works with you could provide supportive, observations of you that you can then reflect on, learn and adjust from.
You can also, build a reflective daily practice where you go over the interactions at work that day that stick out and ask yourself questions like: What went well with that? What opportunities did I miss? What might I do differently next time? Then experiment with your answers the next time that situation arises.
And, you can work with a coach to guide you through all of that (yes that’s a plug for coaching and it's a super awesome way to progress faster).
This work will allow you to change the stories you’ve made up and have been telling yourself.
And, since “it’s all invented anyway,” “we might as well invent a story or framework of meaning that enhances our quality of life and the life of those around us”! (The Art of Possibility)